I had been feeling hurt and let down for the past few days. I think we all feel that for the most part of our lives people let us down, lie to us, do not give us what we feel is our due, of love or respect, or attention or fidelity or whatever it may be we feel we have been deprived of. After nursing the hurt in my heart for a few days, I woke up this morning with the thought that if life had a purpose and certainly it has a purpose, than that purpose was not to wallow in unhappiness but to rise above it.
Choices lie in our hands, there is the choice to do something right or something wrong. Then there are the choices of a number of paths open to us but there is just one we can walk on.
When there is a choice of right and wrong and one chooses the wrong, the result at some point is unhappiness, misery, grief, either to that person, their family, someone else, or even society. The actions are considered wrong because their end result is harm, to someone in some way. The person who brings pain due to their wrong choice, may shoulder the responsibility, feel guilty and remorseful, blame themselves or then they may not and they may make little of it. This however is not the case when their pain is the result of someone else’s actions or omissions. Then they are ready to blame the responsible person for a long time, holding grudges, hating, not forgiving. Most times even if the person who has wronged has done many good things, everything is forgotten in that hard “I hate you, I will never forgive you” stance.
When the choice of a number of paths opens up before us and we have the choice to take one path or another, all paths being right, then I believe that life is designed in such a way that each path will yield a similar degree of both rewards and difficulties. They may be totally dissimilar in how they appear but their degree will be the same.
Therefore there is no point in regretting the results of one’s choice and thinking that “I should have chosen that instead”. For example if a person chooses marriage and kids over a higher education or a career, both will bring them rewards and heartache and pain. One may think that the pain a career can bring would not be as intense as say that a marriage might bring, but if the person has concentrated all his emotions and faculties on that career, then any pain resulting through that career choice would be intense. I know that people of pure logic would argue with me on this point, but I do believe in destiny and that whatever path we follow, destiny gives us our share of rewards and pain.
The choice then is on handling it. One can drown in it or one can rise above it. One can show patience or fortitude or even pigheadedness and refuse to allow it to get to them. The second choice is extremely hard, for eg if someone is being constantly abused or belittled then how do they rise above it? That is where the realization that ‘one created for a purpose and that purpose was not to wallow in misery’ comes in.
Weaving Tapestries, Painting Pictures, Dreaming Dreams 
Your best post so far. Simply loved it 🙂
Glad you did, I had sent you a message about the previous one, changes.
Sounds convincing. The thing is when a person is hurt in any way,his negative thinking starts, and only time, and values can get him out of it.
Yes its very true that one’s negative thinking begins like I said in my conclusion “The second choice is extremely hard, for eg. if someone is being constantly abused or belittled then how do they rise above it?” It is important for a person to know themselves and what they stand for and are capable of. it is very important for a person to love themselves. It doesn’t matter what anyone says about you, when you know yourself, you know it is not true. Moreover the truth is that when someone puts another person down, there is something important missing or lacking either in their lives or their characters or their thinking, or something else about them. Well balanced, happy, confident people do not put others down. So the attitude should be buddy there is something wrong with you not with me and you are too weak willed to own up.
A friend who read this post yesterday said that a person should not stay in a job or marriage where they are put down. I don’t think that one should just escape from a situation just because of one unpleasant factor. A job might be perfect for you or there might be children in a marriage who would get hurt by a break up, Moreover a person might actually love the partner despite all their negativity. Nothing is perfect, and compromises are a part of life. I believe in actively fighting against all that makes one unhappy. standing up for oneself. At the same time a person may not want to live in a state of strife constantly and at the same time wish to keep the relationship, in that case it is their choice how they wish to handle it; maybe by ignoring the criticism, at the same time always acting in a way that cannot be faulted so that despite the sickness of mind, a time will surely come when the other person has to honestly accept all the great qualities of their partner.